2004 Dreadhead Joe-Bob

Posted on April 1, 2023 by mwnekoman

2004 Dreadhead Joe-Bob

Of the o-ring Joecon sets that were made, it’s probably not too much of a shock statement to say the Dreadnok Rampage set was probably the worst. Little things tend to make all of the figures wrong, like putting classic Dreadnoks in mostly uniform camouflage, or using a UK-inspired Tiger Force scheme for the Joes, that still doesn’t match with those figures entirely. Still, the biggest stinker in the set is the Dreadheads, and maybe none of them more so than Dreadhead Joe-Bob!

The Joecon guys were really big on coming up with these strange and arbitrary rules for their convention sets. One of their seeming rules was that every set have an army builder, so what did they do for a Dreadnok set? They shoehorned in a Dreadnok army-builder! It’s such a moronic concept, and yet they managed to probably do it in the worst possible way at that. They could’ve repainted random Cobra troops in the colors of the Dreadnok Ground Assault, or even the camo pattern from this set and had something slightly more enjoyable… but no. They opted to make a crap-ton of inbred cousins who are all nearly identical clones of each other.

All of the Dreadheads were made from the body of Muskrat and the head of the Aero-Viper. Besides having bare arms, there’s nothing about Muskrat that really screams Dreadnok at me. The Aero-Viper head does work fairly well, but this should’ve been a one-off character, not someone you get six of. There might’ve not been so many other molds that could pass for new Dreadnoks, but if they had to do an army-builder, Tiger Force Green Shirts or Steel Brigade would’ve been much better.

Dreadhead Joe-Bob finds even more ways to disappoint, as unlike the other Dreadheads, Joe-Bob is nearly identical to the Torpedo figure that was released to retail in the same year. Given the fact that that Torpedo figure is pretty cool too, this virtually renders Joe-Bob completely invalid (To be fair, I think Torpedo simply recycled the Dreadhead paintmasks. Doesn’t change the fact that now he exists, meaning you have less reason to ever want Joe-Bob.). I will say though, I find the Dreadnok tampograph on his mask to look rather nice and it’s very sharp for a detail that’s about the size of a small ant. Also, he has a green beard, so maybe he’s a crazy fan of Hatsune Miku.

His accessories are bland new-sculpt era junk, which includes a gray G36 rifle, a gray pump-action shotgun, and a clear figure stand. There must have been a real obsession with Heckler and Koch during the 2000‘s, since most the GI Joe guns you saw nauseating amounts of were H&K. The little shotgun is okay though, the sculpt is easy enough even for old figures to hold, and it looks decent.

Dreadheads in general are now pretty hard to find, I’ve not seen a listing for this particular one in a while. At auction, the last Billy-Bob that popped up for sale only went for $20. There for a while, Chinese eBay sellers were selling overstock Dreadhead Joe-Bob’s for low-low prices. And by a while, I mean probably years; nobody wanted this thing even for a few dollars. Dealers will occasionally sell one for around $60, but if you’re that desperate for a Dreadhead, this April Fool’s joke is definitely on you!

2004 Dreadhead Joe-Bob Links:

Half the Battle

Generalsjoes

2004 Quick Strike

Posted on March 27, 2023 by mwnekoman

2004 Quick Strike

New-Sculpt era vehicles often presented some interesting ideas, but fell flat on execution. That’s somewhat the case with the Valor vs. Venom Quick Strike, which is a nice looking and mildly fun vehicle, though flawed, in several aspects. Generally, these are flaws that could’ve been easily resolved with small design alterations that simply were not made, which makes me suppose the people designing these toys simply were not so invested.

In 2004, Hasbro cared about GI Joe enough to release more than a requisite AWE Striker and HISS Tank for a vehicle lineup. In fact, there were more than 20 vehicles released that year if I didn’t count wrong, which is fairly hard to imagine at this point. Unfortunately though, the 2000‘s were not the 80‘s, and what would’ve been a banging assortment in 1992 was muddled by standardized price-points, obtuse gimmicks and the lack of a creative play-pattern. With a little more wiggle-room, something like the Quick Strike could’ve been a nice successor to the Monster Blaster APC, but such is not the case.

The Quick Strike is a medium-size vehicle with a similar size and profile to the original HISS Tank. It has a maximum capacity of about 6 figures, which includes two in the front cabin, one in each turret, and one on each of the two foot-pegs on the rear of the vehicle (just magically standing there with nothing to feasibly hold onto). The anti-infantry gun pivots both left and right, and can be aimed up and down too. Meanwhile, the lift-up missile launcher is fixed in it’s position, and can’t be aimed at all. Two additional missiles for the launcher are stored at the very bottom of the vehicle in the back (which doesn’t seem very intuitive). It really doesn’t do that much of interest, but it’s also not a very big vehicle, so it’s a little forgivable.

The back of the box describes the Quick Strike as an “Armored Vehicle”, presumably because any designation more specific than that would impart a purpose this vehicle likely cannot achieve. Something I find odd about the vehicles from this era, are their often over-engineered gimmicks that serve questionable purposes, while somewhat failing at more basic things you’d want to do with a GI Joe vehicle. A missile launcher really could’ve been stuffed anywhere else on the vehicle, like hanging off the side or underneath the cockpit, but instead it’s smashed into the rear of the vehicle, where I really would’ve much rather had some extra seats or a computer station. Most of the vehicles from the period are like this, where mid-sized vehicles usually had some kind of towering cannon pop out to fire a missile in one direction, at the cost of virtually any other play feature.

A strong point of the Quick Strike is that it does look relatively good. The sculpt is decent in most places, and it has all the familiar tapestries of a classic GI Joe vehicle, including shovels, tow-rope, hammers, and various other tools strapped to the outside of the vehicle. Personally I think this vehicle is rather photogenic; it fills up the frame really well, and it looks decent to have figures posed around it. It’s simple look and camouflage paint job also help it look decent with older sculpts, in particular, I think it pairs up somewhat nicely with the DEF guys, who never really had a good ground vehicle.

Quick Strikes don’t appear to be as cheap or common as they should be, with complete examples floating between $40 and $50 when you find them. I got mine back in ‘19, and if I recall correctly I only paid around $20 for a MISB example, meaning prices have essentially doubled since then. It’s bizarre to me, since I really don’t think 2000‘s GI Joe has that much of a fan base, I certainly haven’t seen any large amount of individuals demanding iconic characters like Dr. Link Talbot be remade for Classified… So I really have no clue who’s behind the market for $50 Quick Strikes.

2004 Quick Strike Links:

Joe A Day

Generalsjoes

1987 Nemesis Enforcer

Posted on March 21, 2023 by mwnekoman

1987 Nemesis Enforcer

In some ways, I feel like you can’t have an opinion about Cobra-La that’s not an opinion about GI Joe: The Movie. Partly, I think that’s because these toys would have no reason to exist if not to be the movie’s new villains. So if you like the movie, you probably like Cobra-La. If you hate the movie, you probably hate Cobra-La and the Cobra-La Team 3-pack. For me, the movie is an absolute guilty pleasure, and I’m open Cobra-La because of that; the same thing is pretty much my opinion of Nemesis Enforcer.

As a design and concept, Nemesis Enforcer provided GI Joe with an interesting opportunity to do some very odd things. I feel like this something crucially missing from modern interpretations of the brand, as Nemesis Enforcer really has a lot more uniqueness and identity embedded in him than your run of the mill Ghost Clancy: Call of Honor-inspired commando toy. There’s a deeper imagination present here of the kind of enemies GI Joe might face, which in Nemesis Enforcer’s case, is an abominate and soulless creation of an ancient bio-mechanical society. It’s like something from a super market tabloid, and in it’s own way I find a great deal of interest in that.

Uniqueness aside, Nemesis Enforcer is not the most breathtaking figure I’ve laid eyes on. I like the Royal Guard a lot better, though Nemesis Enforcer is leaps and bounds better than Golobulus, if only for the fact that the lower half of the toy isn’t a green-turd. I feel like the figure suffers from the fact that the sculpting on his outfit is a little more vague, and at the same time, the details of his face don’t contrast very well. Speaking of his face, I think it’s neat they painted his eyes as a pair of eerie white dots as opposed to painting them normally, but again, it doesn’t show up very well.

Nemesis Enforcer takes the liberty of using some fairly unusual colors for a Cobra. 1987 was the year where purple became a Cobra color, but on Nemesis Enforcer, it’s more of a lavender shade, much lighter than the Techno Viper or the Hydro Viper from ‘88. It’s paired with red details and some tan/off-white, along with a few other colors for small details (silver on his arm spikes and white for his aforementioned beady-eyes). These colors accentuate him nicely, and give him the feeling of something a little bit older than his release year. The kitsch colors make me think of a comic-book villain from the 60‘s or early 70‘s (I guess Magneto fits that criteria).

His parts are very odd. He comes with no ordinary weapons, but instead a pair of backpacks representing the appendages he could spontaneously grow on his back, one that features a pair of bat wings, and another with a series of green tentacles. Both are made from a soft, rubbery plastic, which is pretty unique to this figure. It’s hard to justify a GI Joe with no real weapons, but as a kid I would’ve probably liked this a lot. I loved Guyver and characters that had blade-appendages on their arms, so he would’ve probably found some roles among the likes of Blanka. Likewise, these backpacks would’ve probably seen plenty of use with the Star Brigade. Makes me sort of sad the tentacles never saw a use again, using it as a parasitic growth on some random Cobra repaint would’ve been really cool.

A mint, complete Nemesis Enforcer is worth about $10, though ones with the filecard consistently hit $20. Relatively speaking that’s not too expensive, though as a maligned faction, Cobra-La has never been popular, which has shown through to the pricing of these figures for years. I find Cobra-La a lot of fun as some kind of novelty, and also because I liked the movie, so I’m glad figures like this one remain affordable when most Joes are not.

1987 Nemesis Enforcer Links:

1988 Storm Shadow

Posted on March 13, 2023 by mwnekoman

1988 Storm Shadow

Storm Shadow as a GI Joe is a concept I’m not so sure about. At this point, it seems to be something that’s been mostly forgotten about, which I find weird since Tommy was a good guy for more of ARAH than he was bad, but I suppose it goes to reinforce the notion that GI Joe died after 1987. Regardless, this was a pretty fun toy, and it also completely changed the character of Storm Shadow from it’s release to the line’s cancellation in ‘94.

Despite being a year of toys I like a lot, 1988 has a lot of random guys, and not quite as many surefire winners like you had seen in years prior. From that end, you can see some of Hasbro’s motivations for bringing Storm Shadow back with a new figure, since from what I understand of the old stories, the original was one of the first ‘84 guys to sell out anywhere you could find Joes. Plus, your only other big-shots were probably Road Pig, Iron Grenadier Destro and Sgt. Slaughter, two of which were vehicle pack-ins. To a mild extent, it makes Strom Shadow the poster boy for 1988, which surprises me, as it’s not something I normally think about.

I don’t think this is my favorite Storm Shadow sculpt overall. The hooded design does a nice job of differentiating this figure from the original, while maintaining the look of a ninja, though I find the sculpt leaves something to be desired. It’s detailed, and the proportions are alright, though speaking of the later I tend to find that the way the figure goes from baggy sculpted pieces to thin sculpted pieces to be a little jarring. It’s not necessarily wrong, just awkward by sight and feel, like around his shin guards, or the bagginess of his perpetually lifted sleeves. On his own, it’s a fairly good ninja toy, but when compared to the standard set by the ‘84 Storm Shadow sculpt, I don’t think it’s quite as nice.

While plenty of details go without paint to show them, I think the deco is one of this figure’s stronger elements. You have the distinctive Tetris-block cammo that premiered in ‘88 and saw seldom use afterwards. We probably lost a few nice paint masks for the cammo, but I like it, and the figure seems a little more memorable for having it. You also have the Arashikage clan tattoo featured prominently on Storm Shadow’s right arm, which I think is probably the most substantial detail featured on the figure. Without that one detail, I think this would be a much more boring figure, but it’s presence is cool and eye-catching, especially since the rest of his colors are a fairly monotonous mixture of white and gray.

Storm Shadow includes a red backpack and sword, a black claw and compound bow. Like a lot of ‘88 figures in my collection, I have the misfortune of not having completed this guy years ago when prices were cheap. Fortunately in this figure’s case, his parts were reused quite a bit in the following years, so the claw and bow are parts I have several other copies of. The bow is a bit hard for figures to hold, so I don’t like it too much, but both parts look alright. The backpack is one of those with hooks for sliding his sword into; this was a common gimmick in ARAH, though one I’m also not so keen on. To me, it seems like the clips had too much of a tendency to stress the sword or break off, which limits them to just looking odd on the backpack. I think these parts being bright red looks a little weird too, but there again, this figure didn’t have a lot of color, so that’s probably the motivation for that.

After it’s use here in the US, the mold went to Brazil and later Funskool who used it for very similar releases. Then the mold was recalled by Hasbro who put it to use for a pair of repaints, a boring and uninspired green figure in the ’04 Ninja Cobra Strike Team set, and a Red Ninja Viper included in a comic-pack. Both of the later repaints are fairly mediocre, and I think their boring decos make the mold seem a lot worse. The lack of a satisfying repaint from this mold makes him one I’d be tempted to buy some extras of for customs, but that might require more energy than I’m willing to put in, given this release is already good enough.

Mint complete examples of ‘88 Storm Shadow go for around $20, though I notice the figure is both fairly common and also one that frequently goes well above that price, and slightly below it too. To me, that means the figure is probably worth less than $20, but there’s still some holdover pricing from the seller’s market of the past few years. While it’s not my favorite version of Storm Shadow, nor one I’ve even used in pictures until just the past year or so, it’s still a very solid toy, so I think the pricing is about right for it.

1988 Storm Shadow Links:

1989 Darklon

Posted on March 6, 2023 by mwnekoman

1989 Darklon

Darklon’s an interesting figure to me, particularly for the fact that he’s one of those figures that’s really grown on me since I got him. Of course, like half of the Iron Grenadiers he’s fairly flawed, but the character was pretty cool, and if any classic Cobras needed replacing in the 80‘s, it was probably Destro more so than Cobra Commander.

Overall, Darklon’s kind of a tough sell. His first problem is that he’s tied to a vehicle, Darklon’s Evader. I believe I’m more open than most people to oddball GI Joe vehicles, though the Evader is something I’m fairly certain I’ll never own unless it’s by pure chance. Usually, when Hasbro packed an important character with a small vehicle, the character was some kind of big badass, and the vehicle was more like an oversized accessory (See Zartan, Serpentor, Sgt. Slaughter, ect.). In Darklon’s case, he’s kind of an oddball in bell-pepper colors, who comes with a motorbike(?) too embarrassing for a Funskool Batman figure to use. Maybe in a different context it wouldn’t have seemed so strange to me.

The main appeal of Darklon is his albeit underdeveloped character, which mainly only existed for a brief tenure in the Marvel comics. That’s one way of saying the toy really isn’t that good, as without some interest in his role in the GI Joe world, this wouldn’t be a figure much worth paying attention to. Still, I associate him with some pretty cool issues and moments in the comics, such as the debut of the Python Patrol. He did more than Voltar anyways.

Now normally in a comic-book story line, having a popular character whose getting worn-out replaced by his family member who pretty much does all of the same things (Just more evil!), is a pretty shabby way of trying to get repeated interest and sales, but with Destro and Darklon, there’s actually a pretty good case for it. By this point in the comics, a lot of the older Cobra’s were played out and over-exposed. Destro especially, saw his character melt and go from being a ruthless, terrorist arms-dealer, to being some kind of half sympathetic anti-hero, dedicated to Baroness, and nice enough to smooth over her life-long hatred of Snake Eyes! I think it would have been better if a character like Darklon had played a bigger role after his initial appearance, especially since I do think he was genuinely cool for the few scenes he had.

Putting his character aside, Darklon’s a guy who wears an outfit so random and asymmetrical it looks like something that’d be made by an AI-art generator. Asymmetry is a big theme in the Iron Grenadier aesthetic, so I understand it’s role here, but Darklon still might look just a little too random. Probably the most strange detail is the strap of tiny gold grenades on his right knee, which is among the dumbest grenade-oriented details I’ve seen on a GI Joe toy. Though, in Darklon’s defense, maybe they’re just decorations.

Everything else is just kind of okay for him. I like his head, the mask-sculpt especially looks pretty neat; the texturing on his shirt is nice too. Nothing special, but a good enough figure to represent a gaudy European warlord. In that context, even his wack-o colors aren’t so bad, but the Bronze Bombers repaint into Crazeblaze is much better. That would be my go-to Darklon, but mine’s missing his arms, so I still have to fix that at some point.

Despite being a late-era vehicle driver, Darklon gets the privilege of having a gun. It’s a terrible kind of weapon that looks more like an air-soft or a Nerf gun, so I’ve yet to bother with one. My personal replacement for this is the black version of Skydive’s pistol, also included with Battle Corps Leatherneck. It has a bulky, sci-fi look to it, which I think suits him pretty well.

To my Surprise, mint complete Darklon’s fetch a steady $15. Ones missing the gun go for about half of that, and ones sold with the Evader trend towards $30. Not the worst price, but more than I’d have expected for figure that’s both obscure and somewhat unremarkable. I like him and he brings value to my collection, so I suppose others just see him that way as well.

1989 Darklon Links:

1988 RPV

Posted on February 27, 2023 by mwnekoman

1988 RPV

The RPV, or “Remote Pilot Vehicle”, is one of those ideas for a GI Joe toy that’s actually rather cool and interesting, but comes across somewhat bland as an actual toy. I’ve seen this toy get put through some harsh put-downs by collectors at various points, though I think there’s other GI Joe vehicles that are more deserving of thorough admonishment. Still, it’s a somewhat flawed vehicle, but not without it’s merits.

So, to my limited understanding of Cold War-era RPV launchers, this vehicle is actually fairly realistic and would serve a real purpose. Remote Pilot Vehicles, or as you may know them now by the modern acronym UAV, were first being used for reconnaissance and intelligence operations around 1960 during the Vietnam War. At the time, these vehicles were top-secret of course, and they looked a lot different than the drone equipped on GI Joe’s RPV, but it’s another element that ties back to ARAH’s heavy reliance on Vietnam-era military tech. I’m not sure if either the drone or the launching vehicle here is based on any particular real-word equipment, but similar vehicles would’ve been in use around the time of this toy’s release.

A major problem for the toy, is that I don’t think too many people really understand how one of these would work, especially not in 1988. With some cursory reading, I can imagine a few scenarios where the RPV could be involved with some very fun GI Joe adventures, but I doubt so many children of the 80‘s knew too much about these, which meant those adventures probably never happened.

Aviation history aside, the RPV has a critical problem as a toy: It doesn’t do much. Small vehicles are limited in what they can provide, but the RPV essentially launches it’s drone and sits there. Just by way of it’s gimmicks, it’s a little more interesting than the Battle Barge, but this isn’t a toy that does a whole lot of things. Of course, it has some then requisite features to make it a tad more interesting, like a tow-hook and the seat-belt. The drone has a removable nose cone too, which reveals some computer details.

My biggest gripe with this vehicle is no doubt the radar station. When fully hooked up it makes this vehicle really cumbersome and tedious to move around. It connects to the RPV via a standard rubber-hose like most figures included. Unfortunately though, the pegs for it are in these odd recesses on both the vehicle and the radar station, meaning you can’t gently push the hose on like you normally would. I had both pegs break on me recently, so I blame it on that.

In Europe there was a significant recolor of this vehicle, where the tan was replaced with silver and the white was replaced with Cobra-blue. Just for it’s oddness I’d kind of like one, but between the fact that it’s terribly hard to find, and that the RPV isn’t something you need more than one of, I doubt I’ll ever bother with it. The color choices were especially weird on it though, as it makes it look more like the Cobra Adder than any existing Joe vehicle.

The RPV is virtually worthless. Mint complete examples sold by toy dealers who can usually get 300% of a figure’s value at auction, can only sell the RPV for $8 to $10. It’s odd, niche, and doesn’t fit with any particularly beloved subset of figures, so I think there’s generally not much of a market for it. Despite that, I personally feel like this was the best drone-related vehicle in the entire toy line, and there’s enough there that it’s worth having.

1988 RPV Links:

3D Joes

Toys from the Past (European variant)

A Real American Book

1992 Road Pig (Super Sonic Fighters)

Posted on February 20, 2023 by mwnekoman

1992 Road Pig (Super Sonic Fighters)

In my early years collecting Joe, I really didn’t like the later Dreadnoks all that much. For me, the Dreadnoks stopped at Buzzer, Ripper and Torch. So while I was collecting 25th figures and the tail end of the New-Sculpt era, Dreadnoks other than those three were something I didn’t put a lot of energy into acquiring. My opinions on a lot of topics haven’t changed that much over the years, but Dreadnoks are something I found myself increasingly open to, including zany figures like Sonic Fighters Road Pig.

Dreadnoks work for me a lot more now than they used to. At a time, I saw them as goofy, Mad Max crossed with the Garbage Pail Kids type characters. Figures like Road Pig, Zarana or Gnawgahyde seemed to me more like some kind of gross-out toy, much more on the cartoonish end rather than the extremely serious and at all times realistic military drama that was GI Joe. My thinking about Cobra has changed a lot over time though, and frankly, the Dreadnoks and how they operate seem a lot more fun and really-stuck now than it used to. In particular, I like them for acting as mercenaries that seem less elite or polished than your typical Cobra with a face. They also account for about half of all Cobra’s that aren’t army-builders, which is nice when Computer-Nerd Viper V3 gets boring.

In recent years, this has become my favorite version of Road Pig. The colors are harsh, and it’s not as detailed as the ‘88 release, but at the same time he sees some benefits from being a neon repaint. First, he really stands out; the obnoxious orange skin-tone coupled with the rest of his colors leaves him instantly noticeable in any environment. It also suits the character a good deal, as Road Pig’s supposed to be a gaudy, nasty looking guy, so the neon colors make sense and work well with him. I think the last thing I really like, is just how distinct the figure is next to his respective peers. A lot of the Dreadnoks often feel like retreads of similar designs and colors, but this one doesn’t fit with much besides maybe Ninja Force Zartan.

Of course, that subjective reasoning aside, this Road Pig is an UGLY figure, and there’s not much disputing that. The skin-tone is such a weird and unnatural color, that also has the misfortune of contrasting poorly with his orange hair. There’s also something that bothers me about the crossbow bolts on his leg, seeing as how he no longer includes the accessory that’s in reference to (although, you can fix that by giving him the parts from the Night Creeper Leader).

His accessories are something else that received an overhaul, and once again I don’t at all mind this. Included with Sonic Fighters Road Pig is an orange machine gun, an orange flamethrower, his original shoulder pad in orange, a backpack that makes lights and sounds, and a figure stand. So besides the shoulder pad, the original hammer, crossbow and arm-shield are gone, though personally I don’t see this as much of a loss. While these guns aren’t marvelous, they do the job decently and even look alright with a few other 90‘s figures that have orange colors. Similarly, ‘88 Road Pig’s parts never really worked well for me; the clip-on on parts in particular always felt cumbersome and fell off too much.

A complete ‘91 Road Pig should cap out around $25, but $20 is probably a more reasonable price. Typing that feels weird to me, as this used to be a figure nobody wanted. I only bought one for doing silly things with, until he grew on me some large amount. Of course, we’re also at the point where $20 really isn’t a lot of money, so in that regard I think it’s a nice figure and probably worth it.

1992 Road Pig (Super Sonic Fighters) Links:

Forgotten Figures

3D Joes

Half the Battle

1993 Mutt & Junkyard

Posted on February 14, 2023 by mwnekoman

1993 Mutt & Junkyard

I’ve really come to be fascinated by the 1993 lineup of figures. It’s weird, because I really don’t think this is a very strong year quality-wise, and I’d even go further to say it might even be the worst year of the 90‘s. Garish colors, generic accessories, a deluge of low-quality repaints, those are just some of the problems that reach their peak in this year, while the ‘94 figures seemed to make a return to better quality overall. Still, the ‘93 figures feel interesting to me, I think if nothing else for just how odd so many of them are.

‘93 Mutt & Junkyard is one of those repaint oddities that makes me scratch my head in some ways, but I really like the figure. Mutt doen’t have a bad figure of his four releases in ARAH, though speaking of which, the first thing I find odd is that Mutt (& Junkyard) got four releases! He seems like such an odd character to dedicate two molds and two repaints to for back then, but I suppose dogs are popular, so that’s probably a selling point that warranted his occasional return.

The colors are so-so on this version of the sculpt. The orange doesn’t really bother me, and browns and greens are exactly the same as the DEF release. Still, the orange and blue are just so saturated, it throws off the look of the other parts. Oddly, I think the bright colors look nicer for night-shots with cool and dark colors, as it makes him a little easier to see. It’s a niche reasoning, but for me it matters a lot, since photos are one of the ways I still get to enjoy playing with my toys.

He’s a very bulky sculpt, though it’s not as odd or inhibiting to him as it is for others (Like Mace). According to his filecard, he’s wearing a life vest flak jacket, which I find neat and mildly justifies the aforementioned orange color. It also gives him some added life for your boat and naval crews, which is nice (and likely meant to tie-in with the Shark 9000). He’s also really decked out with shin-guards and elbow-pads, which makes him a few shades of black away from being a POC or Classified figure. Other than that, it’s a modest and simple sculpt that I like a lot.

gi joe mutt & junkyard 1993 vintage toy hasbro battle corps DEF

Note that the G11 here appears to be a bad casting. It’s perfectly smooth on all of the parts where details are missing. I also just realized that one of the childhood G11’s I have is shiny and one is dull, so they are not exactly the same as most sites indicate. If you know which one is Headman’s and which one is Mutt’s, I”d love to hear it.

The pistol connoisseur in me is very glad that DEF Mutt’s pistol made a return for this release, with the addition of Headman’s gear, only with an opaque launcher and no light. Included is his pistol, Junkyard, Headman’s G11, missile launcher and a stand. The pistol is a really nice sculpt worthy of having multiples off. To that end, I think it’s really sad that a nice accessory like this wasn’t used more in favor of something awful like V1 Shockwave’s pistol. The Headman gear is really weird: a drug-kingpin having a tacky, gold G11 made some sense, but why Mutt? It just seems so odd for him to be toting around an experimental prototype gun (With costly, proprietary ammo!), and one that’s in gold no less. Might’ve been cool if we had gotten this sculpt in black, but for now it remains another addition to Saddam Hussein’s armory. Oh, and Junkyard is the same toy dog he was in ‘84, which interestingly makes him quite an old accessory to still be in use by this point.

It’s hard to peg down exactly what a ‘93 Mutt and Junkyard are worth right now. At the very least, you can get a complete one for $20 and a carded one for $30, so he’s not worth too much. Of course many examples are missing his pistol, but even that part is not too hard to come by on it’s own. With a little luck, I think a complete one should really only be worth around $15, since most of his parts are not unique and appear to be fairly common.

1993 Mutt & Junkyard Links:

Half the Battle

3D Joes

Joe a Day

1989 Python Viper

Posted on February 6, 2023 by mwnekoman

1989 Python Viper

Viper repaints are something I like; Python Patrol repaints are another thing I like. Naturally, I like the Python Viper a lot because of this, but that’s not much of a surprise. It’s not a figure that does anything particularly amazing, though at face value it’s probably the best Viper repaint ever made, which by extension makes it the best Python Patrol figure ever made too.

The Python Patrol as a whole, is a set that works best in harmony with each other, though not so much piecemeal. Each figure’s colors pulls off another in various ways, which makes oddball repaints like the Python Crimson Guard look much more reasonable when in the company of the Python Viper and Tele-Viper. I think that’s part of why some fans desire a requisite Python repaint for virtually every Cobra, since they have a nice aesthetic and represent an interesting idea, though not many figures outside of their group really match with them much.

I never got to read most of the Marvel comics until just recently, and the comic’s take on them as stealth units being deployed by Darklon in eastern Europe struck me as an interesting idea. In particular, I’ve always viewed them as Cobra’s jungle fighters, since that’s what almost everything else seems to pin them as, including the fact that they’re the Cobra analog to the Tiger Force. Besides that though, pairing them with Darklon and other contemporary Cobra’s is antithetical to my view of them as a harmonious set; it’s cool, but I still don’t think it looks as good in practice.

The Python Viper is very nice for several reasons. One is that his colors are mostly gray and black with some yellow details, which is pretty much the perfect ratio of drab to bright colors for a GI Joe figure. The brighter gray is also very nice for appreciating the sculpted details of the Viper mold, which are much easier to overlook on the original blue and black colors. Other than that, it’s cool because it’s different. That may sound dismissive, but army-builder repaints like the Python Patrol are usually a little superfluous like that.

You get the same rifle and backpack from the ‘86 Viper, just now in black. It’s a simple kit that works, and while the light-gray weapons were originally something I didn’t mind, the Viper rifle looks much more convincing in darker colors. I would like them even more if I actually owned some, though Python Patrol gear always runs up the price of a figure more than I feel like it’s worth. If given the choice, I’d rather have two Vipers with replacement guns than one that’s complete.

I feel like prices are faltering some on Python Patrol items, at least from the height of the post-covid market. Oddball auctions for Vipers are starting trend lower, though just a few months ago there were still tons that were hitting upwards of $40. Incomplete figures usually go for less than $20, which is a slightly more reasonable amount. I get the sneaking feeling the prices on the Python Patrol got pushed way up by that wave of post-covid speculators, and a lot of morons who were hoarding oddities as “investments”. I like these a lot, but I won’t be getting any more until prices come down.

1989 Python Viper Links:

1991 Battle Wagon

Posted on January 30, 2023 by mwnekoman

1991 Battle Wagon

1991 produced some classic GI Joe figures that any frequent reader of this blog would know I like quite a bit. The vehicles from this year however, are not a thing I find myself the biggest fan of. In general, I don’t think a lot of 90‘s vehicles compare too well to the offerings from earlier in the line, even though some of them were still quite ambitious like Armor Bot, or generally fun like the Brawler. Then you have things like the Battle Wagon.

Straight to the chase, the Battle Wagon is not a vehicle I fancy myself a fan of. To me, it just looks too stupid to ever be something I could take seriously. Still, I can’t really fault it for existing, as it is very much a product of it’s time, maybe so much so that I’d even say it’s the most 90‘s-centric toy of ARAH. I mean, it’s basically a monster-truck for GI Joes with a gargantuan multi-barrel missile-launcher turret in the back. It’s completely ridiculous, but it also seems tailor made for the interests of a young boy in the 1990‘s, so it’s not without reason.

In terms of playability, it pretty much checks all the important boxes for a large GI Joe item. It supports a decent amount of figures, has firing weapons, a working tow winch, is motorized, and even has a removable battle station in the same vein as the MAGGOT. It has a lot of things you can do with it, and most of the gimmicks work well enough too, which makes it inherently better than a total dud like the Attack Cruiser. One problem with a lot of very large GI Joe toys, is that they take up a ton of space without really doing all that much, which is fortunately not the case here.

For my uses however, the Battle Wagon is much too over-the-top to ever really be useful. While the military industrial complex can justify the existence of a great many absurdities to waste my money on, in the end of the day the Battle Wagon really is just a monster-truck. For the GI Joe team, it looks far too out of place to work in my eyes as military equipment, and generally it’s really just a much worse version of the Mean Dog. It has some cool gimmicks like the hidden computer station under the turret, but what’s the point of it? To me, it really does feel like something crammed in just to give it more play features, though I suppose that’s not the worst thing.

The turret/gun station is another element that should be really cool, but just isn’t. The Mean Dog, Maggot and Thunderclap all do a similar thing, where the turret can be removed and used as an individual piece, but they don’t look so ridiculous. The individual components of those vehicles also tended to look a little better on their own, while I find the Battle Wagon looks really empty without it’s turret. At the same time, it looks really silly with it, so there’s really no helping it.

I have no childhood memories of playing with the Battle Wagon, and through all of my adulthood I’ve barely so much as touched the thing, besides one time taking it apart to rescue a handful of parts my brother lost in it as a kid. In fact, the only thing that prompted using it for some photos is that Battle Corps Cross Country’s filecard mentions he drives it, and I had one, so I used it. In that light, I’m tempted to say I’ve generally had a sense of contempt for this thing for the longest period. Despite that, I realize that it’s not an objectively bad toy, rather, it’s a good one that suffers for being too big and ridiculous looking (The opposite of the MOBAT, a toy that looks great, but is too small and does almost nothing!).

Battle Wagon’s float around $30, with the price usually getting jacked up by shipping since it is a very large vehicle. Truth is, that’s really not a lot of money for a large vehicle like this, but that probably goes to show the general disinterest in this vehicle. Crazy things like Dreadnok vehicles can be fun when they don’t take up much real estate, but this vehicle doesn’t really provide much for how much space it takes up. I respect it for being a toy that could’ve only existed in the 90‘s, but there’s countless GI Joe vehicles that do similar things in a much better way.

1991 Battle Wagon Links:

3D Joes

There’s not much out there on the Battle Wagon, so if you have some cool Battle Wagon content or photos, feel free to share ’em.