2003 C.A.T. II

In terms of Hasbro’s 2000‘s failures with GI Joe, few items strike me as more of a flop than the KB Toys exclusive Crimson Attack Tank. Mind you, I didn’t watch that go down live, as in 2003, I was a mere 9-years old. But the 2003 CAT had a long life at retail, and languished on the aftermarket long enough for me to pick one up cheaply as a teenager. Because of that, I probably like it better than I should.

You wouldn’t know it now, but used to, Big Bad Toy Store sold a decent amount of vintage items. Usually, their prices weren’t all that good, but every now and then something would set around for long enough that they’d put it on clearance. Occasionally, I’d pick up a decent deal from them this way, such as with the CAT II, which had been rotting at KB Toys stores a few years prior. I missed out on the best CAT II clearances there, mainly because I was only taken to KB Toys once a year. Though, if I had seen the CAT II at retail, I can guarantee I wouldn’t have bought it, because I was a germophobe as a child and refused any toys with open-packaging like the Spy Troops line had.

The CAT II was my introduction to the MOBAT mold, and I have to say, I’m glad I started with a CAT II and not the MOBAT. I’ve always enjoyed this vehicle for providing me with an interesting, realistic looking tank for my Cobra arsenal, that also stands out nicely in photos. However, outside of the niche the CAT II provides, the MOBAT sucks. It barely does anything, figures don’t fit on it, the sculpted details are clearly closer to 1/35 as opposed to 1/18… There’s barely anything good I can think to say about it. The only thing fun about this toy is sitting it in the background of photos.

With that said, I don’t hate the CAT II at all. It has all the problems of the MOBAT, but at the very least the CAT II is interesting and eye-catching, while the MOBAT is dull and easily replaced by several better GI Joe tanks (the Mauler). I do wish that I could fit a few more troops on the CAT, or at least a driver, but for $10 with a cool Crimson Guard Immortal repaint, I’ve gotten more than my money’s worth out of it. That said, I’ll probably never buy an ’85 CAT unless I find it near that price too.

Cobra having GI Joe weapons is a seedy and interesting idea that really appeals to me in the fiction. GI Joe’s top-secret and experimental weapons falling into enemy hands speaks not only to Cobra’s fighting capabilities, but also to the levels of Cobra’s entrenchment. Personally I’m not really familiar with the CAT’s comic appearances (if it even had any), but it speaks to the traitorous nature of the arms industry, and works well with a shady character like Destro slipping around. It gives me something to play around with in my head, which again, is more than I can say for the MOBAT.

Sadly, the days of cheap-as-free CATs are all but over. Now, it’s hard to find a CAT II, and when you do, it’s usually some nerd selling it as a buy-it-now for $100. It’s not worth that in any regard, but it’s not very often you’ll find one left to open pricing besides that. I honestly wonder how many of these were just tossed in the trash or ended up in landfills somewhere. There had to be thousands of these that never sold, and most collectors only wanted it for the CGI repaint. Personally, I think it’s a neat toy, but it’s only fun for a few dollars.